From the
snappy title above (yes…it did take me a long time to think of the title), I’m
sure that people have realized that this week’s discipline was about the art of
fasting. After reading the chapter on
fasting, I realized that this is something that would probably be “easier” to
do than the other disciplines that I have been practicing as a result of taking
the class of Spiritual Formation. It
should be “easy” in the fact that I would be reminded constantly while I was
fasting to be engaged in thoughts of God.
It turns out that fasting is more difficult than I thought it would be.
For those of you who do not really
have a clear understanding of what the definition and purpose of fasting is don’t
worry. You are in wonderful company with
me! At the start of this exercise, and
even now as I write this blog, I really had no idea why I would allow myself to
take a break from anything, much less the sustenance that I need to get me
through my day. Fasting, according to
Scripture, is defined as “abstaining from all food” with “spiritual purposes”
always in mind (49). Usually, fasting is
a personal choice in order to develop a closer relationship between the person
fasting and God. However, fasting can
also include group fasts (50). For this
week, I chose to do a personal fast which would last for a little over twenty
four hours. This meant that I would miss
a total of three meals by choice, something that I had never really done
before.
 |
| You know...just craving a burger. |
After eating lunch on Sunday, I set
off to do the work that had been neglected due to a class trip. As the hours passed by, I found myself
constantly thinking about snacking and seriously considering stopping the fast
and purposefully failing this assignment.
I know, pathetic right? But, come
on, who doesn’t want to pig out while they are working on homework?!? Don’t judge me! All in all, the first night was rough. Instead of going to dinner, I steadily worked
through, not even stopping to consider the fact that I told myself that I would
use the times that I was hungry to pray and spend time in the Word. Right before bed, it hit me that I was going
about fasting in the incorrect way. I
was not meant to use this time to get ahead in my work; I was meant to spend
this time in conversation with God and in reflection and meditation.
The next morning, I made a promise
to myself that I would spend the time that I would usually eat breakfast and
lunch in prayer and devotions. As the
day crept by, I found myself, like the day before, constantly thinking about
food and worrying about my growling stomach throughout class. I also found that I became tired easily. However, I also looked forward to taking a
time out of my busy Monday and refocusing on God. When lunch time rolled around, I fought the
crowd going to lunch and instead went up to my dorm room and spent time in
prayer, praise, and devotions. Although
this time didn’t make the hunger pangs go away, I liked the constant reminders
to say small prayers to God and feel refreshed, not by the food that I was
consuming, but by the Word of God.
As I meditated over my time of
fasting, I realized that my time of fasting had consequences that I hadn’t
really thought about. Skipping lunch to
spend time with God had the consequence of me not being able to practice
intentional community with the people that I attend college with. You see, meal times are a very important part
of being here at Kuyper. It is where all
of the students, staff, and faculty really get to know one another and memories
are made. However, I had to remove
myself from that atmosphere, although it is one that I love, in order to really
connect with God and gain the energy to continue with my day.
When I first began to think about
fasting, I was a little bit nervous because I had never really thought about it
or tried to fast before. However, it
actually taught me that many things can be given up in order for God to connect
with His children. God used the time
that I had set apart to really focus on Him and find joy in His word and love
for me.
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